How I Spent My Friday Evening
Posted: Sat May 17, 2014 12:24 pm
...I heard a vehicle swiftly accelerating, a squeal of tires, and a crash...I run from my computer to the front door as I hear the roar of the vehicle rapidly pull away up the street...I reach the screen door, and see the front driver side of my car is wrecked, and take off running around the curve and up the street after them...I live on a cul de sac...I have the poor bastard surrounded...the sound floats down from the top of the hill...he's motoring around the circle...then I see him coming down toward me...I slow to a walk in the middle of the street, straight at him...he stops his red GMC pick up truck just inches from me...I demand his drivers license...he steps on the gas and bumps my belly with his truck...interwoven with a string of cuss words. that is turning the surrounding leaves brown, I demand he visibly produce his driver license...he continues to romp on the gas and push me down the street...my piercing steel blue eyes drill through his soul, my "death" stare is powerful enough to scare Death himself...the multiplicity and volume of my truck driver mouth brings neighbors to open their doors...he pulls out his license and holds it up...I point to the curb and make him pull over, then reach through the window and snatch his license from his hand...all while still wearing my milkman uniform...